How to Survive Working for a Bad Boss

Maura Schreier-Fleming
Fri, 17 Sep 2021 19:41:03 +0000

You have Covid fears. The economy is weird. You’ve got sales goals to meet. And on top of that, you work for a bad boss.

I’ve worked for great managers and I've worked for some very, very terrible ones. I’ve survived them all. Here is how you can survive working for a bad boss.

3 ways to handle a bad boss

1. Learn your manager's expectations early so you can meet them

The best strategy to survive working for a bad boss is to avoid creating a toxic relationship in the first place. Any time I had a new boss, my strategy to create a survivable working relationships was to schedule an initial meeting with them. I asked them what they needed from me to make their work easier, and they gave me their input on type and quantity of paperwork they expected and needed. Some managers like a lot of detail, while others don’t like much at all.

It might not be enough to create a good working relationship with a new boss, but at least you’ve done what you can to avoid starting off on the wrong foot.

2. Set boundaries that protect you

My first mistake with my first bad boss was to allow him to behave badly. Of course, I was stunned the first time this angry man started screaming (yes, screaming!) at me. That's why I was initially too shocked to reply. He went on and on with his tirade over something I had no control over. I finally said, “Enough already.” He screamed back, “I’m not done!” Unfortunately for me, his tantrum continued.

My ultimate solution occurred months later in his office. During a second outburst, I replied very calmly, “If you can’t talk in a civil tone, I don’t need to listen.” I had been practicing this statement in my head for months as I drove and worked in my sales territory. He screamed back at me, “You can come back when you are less emotional!” I quickly replied, “I’ll come back when you are less emotional.” I got up and left his office.

What happened next? A week later he called me into his office. He then asked me to apologize. I told him I had nothing to apologize for. He then asked if we could forget it. I said yes. That year I got a raise and he never attacked me again.

Learn to set boundaries early so you don’t have to deal with a bad boss.

More articles from AllBusiness.com:

4 Ways to Keep Toxic Clients From Poisoning Your Business

How to Get Fired Like a Pro—And Why You Always Should

Set Boundaries When Working with Contractors

Keeping Customers Happy Without Giving Away the Farm

10 Signs You May Be a Horrible Boss

3. Remember that your boss is your customer

I’m not one to let stupid things go by. Of course, you should never tell your boss their idea is stupid. But when some people make suggestions, some insecure managers think, “He or she is calling me stupid,” and then they push back more—and a war starts.

My mistake was to never give my terrible boss credit for any of his good ideas. Yes, every so often he had a good idea, but I should have seized on those rare times to say a kind word. In fact, when I finally realized (after many months of my stomach churning) that I should say something nice to him, it changed our relationship.

I was on the telephone with him and replied to one of his good ideas by saying, “That’s a great idea.” He was so shocked that I said something nice, there was silence on the other end of the phone. He finally said, “Thank you,” and that was the beginning of our truce. I can’t say that I ever respected this manager, but at least it wasn’t war with each interaction.

You often find nice things to say to your customers. Look hard for nice things to say to your bad boss.

Don't let a bad boss bring you down

Some people just rub you the wrong way. I’ve worked for bosses with terrible tempers, bad judgment, and poor communication skills. It is always helpful to try to figure out what is important to your sanity when working for someone who is difficult, and try to ignore the rest.

Try these strategies if you work for a bad boss. Remember, it’s not their stomach that's churning—it’s yours. You can make it stop.